Our relationship with our bodY
I'd like to share here the main ideas that struck me in the book “Bordel soyons libres!” from Harmony Albertini.
Note: I'm extrapolating some points with my own thoughts, and not everything written below necessarily reflects the author's point of view.
Our body is not a bargaining chip to be loved/chosen if we are desirable to someone.
We are much more than our bodies, and it's our energy that really allows us to connect with others. Yes, our energy is far more precious than our physical appearance. How do you feel around people who are physically sublime but have low energy? Meh… right? Indeed, the most important thing is not beauty standards (which have nothing to do with reality, as they are a human construction and vary over time - see article “standards of beauty”) but the energy and vibrations a person gives off. How can we improve the energy we give off? We could start by doing things that really make us tick and bring us joy, instead of focusing our attention on the elements of our physical appearance that don't suit us. If we spend more time taking care of ourselves, how we feel inside, our happiness, our inner balance and our authenticity, this will necessarily impact our energy upwards. Isn't that a more attainable (and, above all, healthier) goal than trying to reach beauty standards at all costs (some of which are simply unattainable, depending on our biology)? Personally, I've decided to keep these ideas in mind and tell myself that what I want to pass on to others via my presence on Earth has nothing to do with my physical appearance, but rather with what I can embody. And the same applies to my relationship as a couple: of course, I appreciate it if my lover complements me on my appearance from time to time, but I have to bear in mind that my body and my appearance will evolve over time (especially in a society that is incapable of seeing beauty in anything other than youth). So, I might as well not bet everything on that...
The true role of our bodies: our bodies are the vehicles we occupy to get us through this life. So yes, we can and should consider and maintain them to the best of our ability, but by focusing on their functionality rather than their appearance. Can I move as much as I want, dance, have children? Do I take care of my cardiovascular health, my muscles, my bones, what I feed my body so that it gets what it needs in the right quantities? Accepting reality: our bodies will change over the course of our lives (age, physical and/or mental illness, pregnancy, yo-yo dieting, etc.).
I recommend reading this book: Bordel, soyons libres ! (Grand format - Broché 2024), de Harmony Albertini | Éditions Larousse